Employer Provided Optional Life Insurance

If you have ever elected to participate in employer provided life insurance, including AD&D (accidental death and dismemberment) please read the fine print - FOR A LAUGH! It's kind of funny in some parts. It's Open Enrollment time at my employer and here are a couple of chuckles I had while reading over the materials at lunch:

• You may choose a beneficiary other than your employer. DANG RIGHT! Are there people who not only made their job their best friend and married it, but would consider that the company is suffering in financial loss due to their passing? Sorry, Charlie. Can't give your money to the man.
• Children is defined as dependents between the ages of 14 days to 19 years old, or 26 years if a child is a full-time student. This is pretty standard but always makes me chuckle a bit. What 26 year old wants to consider themselves a "dependent" of their parents? It may be tough for that kid to get a date. They aren't disabled or post-military duty, just taking their time.
• AD&D may not be paid to anyone if any loss was caused by war, whether declared or undeclared, or act of war, insurrection, rebellion or riot. So, if I decide to risk life and limb and visit the Macy's purse department at 6 a.m. on Black Friday and a sale-combat-trained lady takes my hand off because I plucked the purse from the sale bin that she wanted, loss results in no payment (riot). Additionally, if Green Peace accidentally mistakes me for someone making dolphin inspired chicken-of-the-sea and runs over me with their speed boat, no dice (rebellion/war). Steer clear of Berkeley if you want to retain your ability to be paid AD&D, just in case.
• On the date your coverage begins, you must be "Actively At Work" or your spouse/children must be performing their "Normal Activities". Ok, this is funny to me because most first days do not consist of active work. You may be engrossed in forms, meeting new people, but working... not so much. Also, who is to say what "normal activities" consist of? Since we don't know what abnormal is, could they just declare anything abnormal and decline to distribute benefits? It's a sham! j/k

Ok, enough! I'm having too much fun being literal. :)